Ottawa, Tuesday, March 20, 2007
CHECK AGAINST DELIVERY
There are those who shrink from the issue of family violencewho recoil from the thought of one spouse attacking the other, or attacking their children.
In part, I can understand their revulsion; as someone who has seen it first-hand, and who has heard many personal accounts from other women, I know that family violence is horrifying.
It's a tragedy, but it should not be a taboo.
When I was appointed to this office, I made the commitment to strive to break down solitudes.
I remain committed to that goal, and I know that family violence is one of the worst causes of solitude there is.
I speak from experience.
I have met with numerous victims over the years, through my work as a journalist and through my involvement in setting up shelters for battered women in Quebec.
Since becoming governor general, I have met with many other women's groups, across Canada and in different parts of the world, recently in Afghanistan on International Women's Day.
All these conversations reveal the sad fact that family violence continues to be a problem.
As everyone here knows, family violence is a crime with many victims, and not all victims are easy to recognize.
People have shared stories about the paralyzing fear of living with a violent parent. It's like living with a ticking time bomb.
Family members will turn off their music, or stop laughing and playing when that person enters the house, for fear of triggering a violent outburst.
No one speaks unless spoken to, and people have described leaving a room when the violent parent enters, to avoid giving offence in some unexpected way.
The anxiety, the stress and the fear are almost unbearable, and then there are the inevitable attacks that eventually occur.
It's a devastating cycle.
And it can have terrible consequences for many years to come.
Victims can become abusers themselves, or else they may seek to avoid confrontation to such a degree that they get into detrimental relationships later in life.
As a result, we can see the ripple effect of an instance of family violence, which spreads out affecting many other people beyond the person who fell under the attacker's blows.
Young girls may grow to have a fear of men; young boys may grow up with feelings of guilt and shame, that they did nothing to protect their mother.
And the victims themselves can be condemned to a life diminished by permanent injuries, chronic pain, emotional and psychological damage, or any number of other trials.
I'd like to take a moment to make an aside.
I recognize that family violence doesn't all cut one waythat there are men who are also victims.
But let's be frank.
The overwhelming majority of the victims are women.
So when we use the term "family violence", what we are essentially saying is "violence against women".
I stress this because honesty and clarity are also part of finding a lasting solution to this problem.
We cannot remain silent.
Silence is very much part of the horror of family violence.
As a progressive, compassionate society, we have a moral duty to speak out firmly and constantly, and work to put a stop to this terrible problem.
Canadian society cannot tolerate a situation where so many members are threatened, and frightened, and injured, and killed.
And as one of the main representative of the values we share as a nation, the Canadian Forces certainly have a role to play in this common endeavour.
There is no excuse for turning a blind eye to violence against the wives and children of men in uniform.
I'm pleased to say that many if not all of our top military leaders would be the first to agree.
While family violence continues to be a problem in the Canadian Forcesas it is in the rest of societythe fact is that attitudes have changed a great deal, and there's a genuine commitment to addressing this problem.
All of you here today are a symbol of that new commitment to come to grips with the scourge of family violence in the Forces.
I have faith in you.
The work you do with armed forces personnel is the key to ending this problem once and for all.
You are helping the violent individuals learn to contain their anger, and you are finding more constructive ways to resolve family problems.
This conference is charting a new course of action.
You are the people who will ensure that that new direction leads to positive results for military families across the country.
I therefore wish you a very interesting and rewarding conference.
May you take the knowledge you gain here and apply it with the people you are working with in your home communities.
In doing so, you will be helping the victims, their children and the violent spouses.
You will also be helping to strengthen our military, by addressing something that insidiously undermines troop morale.
And finally, you will be benefiting Canadian society.
By helping to eliminate violence against women, you will be making our world a better place for all women, and for the people they care for, and who care for them.
Thank you.
