Presentation: Online sexual exploitation – A toolkit for youth ages 15-17
1 - Presentation: Online sexual exploitation – A toolkit for youth ages 15-17
2 - What is online sexual exploitation?
- Online grooming
- Sharing or receiving nude images or videos
- Capping
- Sexting
- Blackmail or “sextortion”
Notes
Today, we’ll be discussing online sexual exploitation. Online child sexual exploitation is the term for when someone, usually an adult, targets someone under 18 online in order to get them to send them sexual messages, images or videos.
Online child sexual exploitation can come in many forms. Today, we’ll be talking about some of the most common ones: naked images and videos, online grooming, sexting and sextortion, and capping. Some of those terms might be familiar to you, and some might not. We’ll talk about what they all mean in just a minute.
3 - If you have experienced unwanted sexual attention from someone online, you are not alone.
Talk to a safe adult.
Notes
A few words before we begin:
This may be a difficult topic, but it’s one that we need to discuss to help you and other teens stay safe online.
There’s one really important thing I need you to take away from this lesson: If you or someone you know has been sent images or videos of people who are naked or having sex, or messages talking about your body or sex that make you feel uncomfortable, please reach out to safe adult, like a parent, other family member or teacher. You will not get in trouble. We are here to help.
4 - Agenda
- Naked images and videos
- Online grooming
- Capping
- Sexting and sextortion
- What you can do to protect yourself
- Resources
- Discussion
5 - Naked images and videos
6 - Video: Naked images and videos
7 - What are we talking about?
Notes
You’ve probably come across images, videos and other content online that is not meant for youth or was meant to be private. This includes pornography or sexually suggestive material.
We’ll refer to those as “naked images and videos”, which can include things like images and videos of people in their underwear, naked people or people having sex.
8 - Where might you see them?
Notes
You might come across unwanted naked images and videos anytime you use an internet enabled device. Unfortunately, that type of content doesn’t just stick to one corner of the internet, and you might see unwanted naked images and videos when you’re not expecting them.
They can show up when you’re doing searches, especially if something is mistyped or if a common search term has a second, more adult meaning.
They can appear while visiting websites, especially in ads. Using an ad blocker is a good way to filter those ones out.
They can also come up while you’re browsing apps and social media, watching videos or playing games. Someone may even send them to you by text, chat or email.
While it’s natural to be curious about sex, being exposed to these images and videos can give you the wrong idea about things like healthy relationships, sexuality, consent, and your own body.
9 - How do I deal with naked images and videos?
- Do not reply to this person
- Tell a parent or a safe adult
- Don’t keep this a secret
- Tell them to stop and consider breaking off contact
Notes
No one should be sending you naked images or videos they find online if you don’t want them to. If someone does, do not reply to this person. Tell a parent or a safe adult what they sent you. Don’t keep this a secret, even if they ask you to.
Tell them to stop sending you these kind of images and consider breaking off contact — your relationship may not be healthy and they may be trying to control or harm you in some way.
10 - What to do if you come across them
- Never share them
- Delete the post if possible
- Talk to a parent or a safe adult
Notes
If you come across unwanted naked images or videos, here’s what you need to do:
Firstly, never send it to other people, even your friends. Sharing naked images or videos only adds to the problem, especially if it was meant to be private in the first place. It may hurt someone and whoever you share with may not want to see them. And if they weren’t shared with consent, you can also end up hurting the person shown in the images and videos. Consent is when someone gives their permission for something to happen or agreement to do something. Non-consensual sharing of these images and videos can even be illegal. The only time you should share images or videos of people who are naked or having sex is if you are reporting them to a safe adult or the police.
If sexual images or videos appear where others can see it, like on social media or in comment sections, delete it. If you can’t delete it, use the website’s reporting feature if available to have their staff take it down.
And if you’re ever upset, confused, or feel uncomfortable or in danger, talk to your parents or a safe adult for help.
11 - It is ok to be curious about sex and sexuality, but some things were never meant to be shared.
Notes
It’s ok to be curious about sex and sexuality, but some things were never meant to be shared.
What’s not ok is when that sexual content makes other people uncomfortable. You should never share naked images or videos, even with friends, even if the person in the videos isn’t someone you know. You never know how receiving that content will make the other person feel.
And if you find naked images or videos of someone you do know, don’t use it to bully or blackmail them. Think about how you would feel in their shoes.
12 - Online grooming
13 - Video: Online grooming
14 - What is online grooming?
Notes
Grooming is when someone becomes friends with a minor online in order to control and take advantage of them for a sexual purpose, whether online or in-person.
They could be someone you know, or a total stranger. They’ll build up a friendship over days, weeks, or even months. They might pretend to be your age or look like an adult.
They may even call you their girlfriend or boyfriend or try to have a romantic relationship with you. And they’ll do all that to try and gain control of you so they can eventually ask you to talk about your body, or send them naked images or videos of yourself.
You need to be aware of grooming because it is a growing issue in Canada — and it can put you in a harmful situation.
15 - Where can online grooming happen?
- Social media apps
- Dating apps
- Online communities
- Text messages or online chats
- Online games where users message or talk to each other
- Livestreaming and video apps
Notes
Grooming can happen anywhere you can interact with others online, including social media, dating apps, online communities, online games, livestreaming apps, and through text messages or chats — even if you think you’re anonymous or feel comfortable on the website.
16 - How does grooming happen?
- Someone approaches you online
- They may pretend to be someone they’re not
- They try to build a connection by talking about your interests
- They might compliment you or give you gifts
- They may exploit existing relationships with your friends or groups
- They will sexualize the relationship by talking about sex or trying to get you to engage in sexual activities
- They might ask you to meet up or send photos or videos
- They may pressure or threaten you if you don’t do what they ask
Notes
All grooming encounters are different, but it can happen something like this:
Grooming starts with someone — whether it’s a person you know, a stranger, or someone within an online group — reaching out to you online and trying to be your friend. They may use a fake profile to pretend to be a kid or someone they’re not.
They will try to build a connection with you by talking about things you’re interested in. They might act interested in your hobbies, tell you that they’re someone you can rely on and confide in, or exploit your existing relationships with friends or in online groups.
They may also give you gifts or compliments.
Once they feel like they’ve earned your trust, they will sexualize the relationship by talking to you about your body or sex, asking you questions about your sexual experience or asking you to engage in sexual touching or activity.
They may try to gain control over you by embarrassing you or making you feel stuck in the situation. This could lead to them pressuring you to send naked or sexual images or videos, asking you to do things over livestream that you might be uncomfortable with, or requesting to meet in person. They might send you photos to encourage you to send some back.
If you don’t do what they ask, they might try to blackmail you to send naked photos or videos. If you’ve already sent some, they might threaten to send those photos to your family or friends.
Remember: You never have to do anything someone online asks you to. You have the right to block anyone who makes you uncomfortable. And you won’t get in trouble by reporting these conversations to a safe adult or the police.
17 - What can you do to stay safe?
Notes
Remember that the people you meet online might not be who they say they are — they might be an adult pretending to be another teen, a stranger pretending to be someone you know, or just a random person pretending to be someone else. They might be someone you think you can trust, or think you’re in a relationship with.
Also, don’t accept gifts or agree to meet up with someone you don’t already know offline, or do know but are suspicious about. Asking for those things is a big red flag, anyway.
But most importantly, know that your feelings matter. If you’re uncomfortable, follow your gut — being safe is way more important than being polite. It’s always your choice and it is never too late to say no. Block or break of contact with them if something feels weird or wrong. Tell a safe adult about the situation and they can help you get out of it. Or, if you don’t want to talk to someone you know, you can report it at Cybertip.ca or to the police.
Whatever you do, know that it’s not your fault. It’s not OK for adults to give sexual attention to teens.
18 - What can you do to stay safe?
Don’t share personal information, including your:
- Full name
- Age
- Phone number
- Address or location
- School
- Schedule
- Usernames and passwords
- Friends and family
- Photos and videos
Notes
The best advice for staying safe online is to be careful when interacting with others — even if they’re people you know.
Keep personal information about yourself private. Make sure any accounts that use your full name, location or personal photos aren’t accessible to strangers, or, better yet, don’t post those things online at all, even in your bio or profile. Even if the account is set to private, strangers can see that information without having to add you as a friend.
19 - It’s ok to interact with people online, but not for them to make you feel uncomfortable.
Notes
It's ok to interact with people online, but not for them to make you feel uncomfortable.
If anyone is making you feel uncomfortable online — whether they’re asking too many personal questions, saying sexual things you don’t want to hear, or sexually harassing you online — you don’t have to listen or do anything they say. You’re always allowed to block anyone you want for whatever reason.
20 - Capping
21 - Video: Capping
22 - What is capping?
Notes
Capping is known as lying for many, but it can also mean when someone, usually an adult, records or screenshots you and your body and what you’re doing over a video call — often without you knowing they are recording. It can happen when you are on your computer, tablet, or phone, or when you’re playing games online, and it can put you in a harmful situation.
23 - How does capping happen?
- Someone talks to you online
- They ask you to video chat
- They may show you a “bait video” that shows someone else to trick you into talking
- They respond to you using a chat feature
- They ask you to take your clothes off, touch yourself or engage in other sexual activities
- They record or take a screen shot of what you do without you knowing
- They may share it with others or post it online
- They may sexually extort you into doing more things they ask
Notes
Capping usually happens fast, and here is how it may occur:
- Someone approaches you online pretending to be someone they are not — often someone around your age
- They may ask you to video chat
- They may show you a “bait video” that shows someone else to trick you into having a conversation with them
- They may respond to your questions or requests using a chat feature to not reveal who they really are
- They may ask you to do things like take your clothes off, touch yourself or engage in other sexual activities, sometimes offering to do the same for you
- If you do what they ask, they will record it, even if it was live-streaming, or take a screen shot and share it with other people — it can end up places like pornography websites or the dark web without your knowledge
- They may threaten to share this video or image with your friends or family to manipulate you into doing more things and/or they may demand you send them money
24 - What can you do to deal with capping?
- Know that people are not always who they appear to be
- Keep personal information and details about your life private
- Don’t rush into doing things someone else asks you to
- Refuse to give in, even if they threaten or keep asking
- Block or break off contact immediately
- If you ever feel you are not in control, talk to a parent or a safe adult
- Reach out for help
Notes
It is important to remember that there are people who will try to trick you into doing things. Here are some ways to protect yourself:
We’ve already mentioned this, but keep your personal information private while online – like your full name, phone number, where you are and details about your life.
Don’t rush into doing things someone else asks you to — trust your instincts. If you ever feel like a situation is out of your control, talk to a safe adult.
Refuse to give in to someone uttering threats or who doesn’t take “no” for an answer — persistence is often controlling and harmful behaviour.
Block or break off contact immediately — what the person is doing is illegal.
Tell a parent or another safe adult.
If you would rather, or if you need additional help or advice, you can reach out to KidsHelpPhone.ca, report it at Cybertip.ca, or get help removing images at NeedHelpNow.ca
25 - It may feel like you are in over your head. But you are not alone. Ask for help!
Notes
Everyone gets in over their head sometimes. Remember that you are never alone. There are people who want to help you, and is it is never too late to ask for help.
26 - Sexting and sextortion
27 - Video: Sexting and sextortion
28 - What is sexting?
Notes
Thinking about sex and exploring your sexuality is a healthy part of growing up, but it can have unexpected consequences if you aren’t careful with who you trust. It can make you vulnerable to people who want to take advantage of you.
That includes sexting — creating, sending or sharing intimate or sexual messages, images or videos of you or your peers with friends, people you know or even strangers online or through a connected device. It could be sending naked images of yourself, sharing a video of a friend naked or having sex, or sending a text describing sexual acts.
No one has the right to pressure you into sharing sexual or naked images. It may seem harmless when it is with your boyfriend or girlfriend, but be aware that once an image is sent, there’s no way of knowing where it will end up.
One of the potential consequences of sexting is sextortion.
29 - What is sextortion?
Notes
Simply put, sextortion is blackmail. It’s when someone threatens to send a naked image or video of you to friends, family or other people if you don’t provide more naked images or videos or do what they ask.
Sexting, capping and grooming can all lead to sextortion if a naked image or video of you is sent.
30 - How can they impact you or your friends?
Notes
Sharing naked images may seem harmless at the time. But, in the wrong hands, they can end up hurting you or other people in many different ways.
For starters, having your naked images shared hurts. It’s a violation of your privacy and can damage your mental health and self-esteem for years to come. It can upset you to know that your images are being shared and commented on. And it can also make you a target of people who might want to force or pressure you into sexual situations you don’t want to be in.
Naked images of yourself can change the way other people see you or treat you. You might be bullied or isolated from your friends. And later on, it can affect your future education, job and other opportunities.
In many cases, it’s against the law to create and share sexualized images of someone under the age of 18 years. Especially if it’s without their consent. Even if you’re not an adult yourself, there can be legal consequences to sharing photos of any minor.
31 - How can you avoid it?
- Understand what a healthy relationship looks like
- Don’t give in to pressure to share naked images or videos
- Know that whatever you share may not stay private
- Be careful who you trust
- Don’t share naked images or videos you receive
Notes
You can’t control the actions of other people, so it is best to avoid the situations altogether. It is important to be able to recognize what a healthy relationship looks like — loving, respectful and caring, not manipulative, intimidating or pressuring.
Don’t give into pressure to share naked images or videos. Those things may not stay private and, while the person who shared those images or videos is the one at fault, it could have a negative impact on your life.
If you receive a naked image or video from someone else, NEVER share with your friends — that just makes you part of the problem, makes the victim feel worse, and could get you in trouble. If you are sent unwanted naked photos, videos or messages, only show them to a safe adult when asking for help.
32 - What can you do if you’ve been sextorted?
- Immediately block and stop all communication
- Refuse to give in to threats
- Keep records of the messages to show those who can help
- Ask for help from parents, teachers, or another safe adult
- Report it to Cybertip.ca or the police
- Get help removing it from the internet at NeedHelpNow.ca
Notes
If you’ve sent anyone naked images or videos of yourself, or if you’re being sextorted, there are steps you can take to get out of the situation.
First, stop all communication with the person asking for or who has received naked images and block them on every platform. Never give in to any threats made by that person — don’t send them more nudes or pay them any money.
Next, save all correspondence with that person by taking a screenshot or printing out the conversation.
Report the incident to a safe adult, to the police and at Cybertip.ca. You can use the screenshots you took as proof to help catch the person targeting you.
If naked photos or videos of yourself have been shared on the internet, you can get help removing them at NeedHelpNow.ca.
33 - It’s ok to explore sex and sexuality, but not when it might harm you or someone else.
Notes
Sex can be confusing. It’s totally ok to be curious, explore your sexuality and express it with people you trust. Whatever you do online, and whoever you talk with, might come with risks. It is always better to be cautious, avoid uncomfortable or potentially harmful situations, and stay safe online.
And if you don’t know how to leave, talk to a safe adult. You’re not alone in these situations — we’re here to help.
34 - Resources
35
Cybertip.ca
Canada’s tip line to report online child sexual exploitation
NeedHelpNow.ca
Get help removing shared naked images or videos from the internet
KidsHelpPhone.ca
Text: 686868
Phone: 1-800-668-6868
Help for Canadians under 18 by phone, text or chat
Notes
You are not alone. If you need any more information on this subject, or need to report it or talk to someone about it, here are some websites you can visit for help.
If you’re not comfortable talking to someone in person, you can also report your experiences online at Cybertip.ca, get help removing naked images or videos of yourself from the internet at NeedHelpNow.ca or get confidential support from Kids Help Phone. I’ll give you some information about these resources for you to take home after this presentation.
36 - Remember:
Notes
If anything we’ve discussed today ever happens to you, just remember:
37 - If you find yourself in any of these situations, it is not your fault.
It’s never ok for adults to give sexual attention to teens.
38 - It is always ok to say no
39 - It is always ok to block someone
40 - It is always ok to break off contact
41 - If you’re in a situation that makes you uncomfortable, talk to a safe adult or report it at Cybertip.ca.
We’re here to help.
Find more information about online child sexual exploitation at: Canada.ca/Child-Exploitation
42 - Discussion
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