Online Dangers: Grooming
Grooming is when someone builds trust with a child, and sometimes the adults around them, to gain access to and control the child by normalizing certain behaviours and expectations.
A groomer might use the following tactics
- Approach your child online by pretending to be someone they are not – may falsely identify themselves as a person from school, or someone their age, to build a connection
- Talk about the child's friends or interests, give gifts and compliments
- Make promises of a better life, a loving relationship, or future gifts, money, drugs or alcohol
- Cause division saying "your parents are too strict" or "your parents don't understand you"
- Normalize sexual behaviours by showing the child sexual images or videos
- Sexualize the relationship by sending or asking for your child to record and send sexual images or videos
- May threaten or pressure your child to do what they ask, which could lead to sextortion
- May ask to meet your child in person
What you can do
The most important thing is to be aware and to talk openly and regularly with your child
- Let them know you are available to talk any time
- Understand they may be hesitant to share with you
- Use real life examples they can relate to that aren't about them
- Talk about online safety, privacy, establishing boundaries, healthy relationships and consent
- Talk to them about not giving in to pressure and breaking off communication if they feel threatened or uncomfortable
- Tell them it's always okay to come to you or another safe adult, even if they think they've made a mistake
- Tell them about resources like Cybertip.ca and NeedHelpNow.ca in case they are worried and do not want to come to you
Watch with your kids
An animated video for youth that introduces the topic of grooming and gives high-level advice.
Learn more about Online Dangers
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